When I came back from Lake Tahoe after 6 measly days away, I went into immediate Car Shock by the sheer number of cars in Los Angeles. It's eat or be eaten out here. Cut off someone else, or be cut off. I decided that I'll allow people to cut me off, but only if I do it in a way that makes them feel bad about themselves. Classic manipulation. I don't Road Assholes to know what I think of their driving, rather I want them to have an epiphany and see their behavior for what it is by the mirror of my passive aggressive driving. I think there's a martial art that does this same thing.

Process By Which Drivers Realize They Are Assholes

1) Car #1 (me) speeds up to cross lane.
2) Car #2 in left lane speeds up.
3) Car #1 slows down and goes back to first lane, but keep tires barely in the other lane. Not enough to cause an accident, but enough for the driver to say, "Whoa, I almost hit that car. I must be an asshole."
4) Car #1 driver rolls down the window and says, "May you have an existential crisis at the next light that transforms you forever."

Just for today, I can celebrate passive aggressive road rage.