I just watched "Californication" and now David Duchovney is my new boyfriend. Before that it was James McAvoy in "Atonement" and before that it was Matt Damon in the "Bourne Identity" series, and before that it was Leonardo DiCaprio in "Blood Diamond," and maybe before that (it all blurs together from here on out) it was Kevin Connolly from "Enterouge," and before that it was Russell Crow in "Proof of Life," and before that it was Gael Garcia Bernal in "Y Tu Mama Tambien," and before that it was Mark Wahlberg in anything, and before that it was Brad Pitt in "Thelma and Louise," (and, though, I hate to admit it), a little in "Legends of the Fall," and before that - at some point in time - it was Tom Hanks in "Bosom Buddies" and before that it was Ralph Machio in "Karate Kid" and before that Jason Bateman in "It's Your Move."

Just for today, I can reflect on my pathetic personal life.