I have a male co-worker/friend who makes the day tolerable by making me laugh and listening to my dating woes (more like my whining). He rides a motorcyle and about a year ago he took me on (for) a ride that was originally intended to be to my car. Without getting into the details (because it's best not to underestimate the LAPD), let's just say that I won't be riding on any motorcyles with him or with anybody for the next few lifetimes. I still think he's great. I'm just very attached to being alive.

On Monday he came into work with a healthy five o'clock shadow. When I asked him about it, he answered:

"For the mojo factor. I've got numbers flying at me now."

Guys are so lucky. The less responsible and vigilent they are, the greater the sex appeal. Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way for women. What sort of action would I get in the city of LA if I bought a motorcycle and let my legs, arm pits, and eyebrows grow out? I might get numbers, but they would, most likely, not belong to men...

Just for today, it sucks being a girl.