As a peer out into my mid-30's, I'm pondering the various paths to beauty that have been trailblazed by those who've come before me. (Please Note: At 33, I don't think I'm old...so don't get all irate if you don't think that's old. If you do think I'm over the hill, that's fine, I probably am).

On one side, there's the High Maintenance Botox Road (which I know of only in theory because I'm not so scrutinizing that I can even tell when a woman has received this treatment) which I characterize by the willingness to put lots of money and time into holding up someone's idea of a beauty standard. I do identify a class of women who don't look wrinkled, but who don't look young either, and I can only assume that they have had "work" done. ("High Maintenance" also brings to mind big purses.... I went shopping for a purse a few weeks ago and it was like being in an SUV lot of hand bags...they were HUGE, with lots of pockets). On the other side of the spectrum there's the Au Natural Road, which just says "f--- it" and kind of surrenders the whole idea of desirability and attractiveness. I have always shunned this path and judged these women as lazy and difficult. I think they terrified me with their utter lack of regard for the mandates of this super-model culture. But lately I've been contemplating this path (although please don't hold me to it because I know that the pressure in this youth-oriented super-model culture can be soul-crushing and I don't blame any woman for going to great lengths to preserve her looks).

It's not that I don't care what I look like, but the little I do to achieve some semblance of glamour is just getting to feel like too much of a damn chore already. Eyebrows, hair, nails...if this gets worse, if aging means that I start piling on more stuff (skin abrasian treatments, botox, etc.), I'm going to need a full day out of every week just for beauty maitenance (not to mention an extra $20,000 a year).

It all looked good on Carrie Bradshaw (the hair, the clothes, the great body), but she had Pat Field dressing her up and a team of make-up and hair people, and a personal trainer.

I know there's a middle-ground somewhere. A way of living that embraces my natural beauty, my inner beauty, and makes room for a little help from my friends at the Prescriptives counter (I am, by the way, going to a Mary Kay gathering this weekend...I like the Pink Cadillac). I just don't know what it is.

Just for today, I can analyze the cost of beauty in this scary world.