Several people in my life have recently brought to my attention the fact that I seem "uncomfortable" with commitment. While it is true that my proximity to many adult maturity milestones (marriage, kids, career,etc.), is slightly akin to my proximity to the moon...I still feel that my fear of commitment is somewhat reasonable. For instance, what happens if I commit to something and then I change my mind? I'm screwed! What happens if I commit to a relationship and then realize that I don't want to be in it anymore? Then it's a big ole mess! And then put kids and a mortgage in the mix, and you have an existential dillema. No, thank you.

My friend Angie suggested that I dialogue with my inner child about my fears of commitment to find out what she's feeling.

Me: Hey! So, how are you?

Inner Child: What?! You want to talk to me now? After all these years? Fuggetabutit.

Me: Hey, what's up with that language?! Let's show a little respect.

Inner Child: Lady, I don't even know you.

Me: Look, I know I have alienated you quite a bit lately, made you do chores, haven't taken you shopping...wait! I bought you a whole bunch of clothes and a new stereo!

Inner Child: You still haven't gotten cable. And what about my guitar lessons? And I want a Jelly Kelly bag and some new Danskos, and more french fries and Ben & Jerry's! You're way behind!

Me: Hey, kiddo! If you weren't sleeping in on Saturday mornings, maybe we'd be farther along! And enough with the junk food.

Inner Child: I don't need a lecture.

Me: Ok, I can see that you have some anger towards me. Maybe I haven't been there for you quite like you would like. But I want to make it up to you. I really do. I'm going to treat you like the angel you are. Just please don't throw any more fits when I meet a nice guy or sit down to write. 'kay?

Inner Child: I'll take a large Mocha with whip cream.

Me: Deal.

Just for today, I can dialogue with my inner child about my fears of commitment.