I just find monolithic resorts kind of sad. It's like vacationing on a slave plantation. However, for the sake of my own need to erase my life of my own fears and pressures, I can temporarily block out the fact that all the maids and waiters and bar tenders are dark skinned and look Indian, whereas the great majority (let's just say all) of the tourists are Lily white. But there is always an insidious feeling of....the word "inequality" comes to mind as a gross understatement.

My only solace comes from the knowledge that non-Americans live in a world of considerable less spiritual dissolution, and at the very least, aren't burdened with the constant pressure to consume.

My greatest fear is that I'm the worse type of American - worse than ignorant naive Americans who don't know better and weren't raised bi-racially in a liberal hot bed - because I'm a GIANT hypocrite. I need to remind myself that hating myself for the state of the world doesn't change anything...except my mood.

Just for today, I can accept my hypocrisy and enjoy the monolithic resort I'm staying in (and the fact that I frequently end sentences with a preposition).